Wednesday, February 26, 2014

I was wrong...I am wrong... and I am sorry

Being a parent isn't easy.  You've heard it before, it's not for wimps.  Well, I am a wimp.  And why God thought I could handle seven amazing people to be my children has caused me more than one sleepless night.
You know, you go to college, take classes from experts, you read books and blog posts, you go to extra parenting classes...and then in the end what really matters is LOVE.

You know you can do SO many things to help your child, help them develop their talents, their testimony of God and Jesus Christ and you can try to teach them life skills ie organization, being part of the team/family and so on.  But if it isn't done with love, not just love but in away THEY feel loved.  It doesn't matter.

It's hard.  We all feel love or loved in different ways.  And true love is finding out how that is for the other person.  Some are simple or similar to our own thus 'easy' and others need love in different ways.  I am learning and I am going to try to love these seven children the way God somehow knew I could.

It will take change, it will take God's help and but you know I love them and I really want them to know that.  It matters to them and so it matters to me.

I am so sorry I didn't see it until recently and hopefully they will forgive my wimpiness. Look past the mistakes and see my heart...someday.


4boyzmdmom said...

Rachelle, you are right! But I think it takes all of us moms most of our lives to figure out how important it is to show our kids that we love them. We DO love them, but we are so busy trying to teach them all the other things they need to know to function in life and to serve the Lord that sometimes the love doesn't come through the way we want it to. BUT you are not a wimp and I am positive that your kids have felt your love in spite of the times you've made mistakes (as we all have). You may not realize it, but you radiate love and concern for everyone you meet! I have felt that, and I know your kids have felt it. So don't be too hard on yourself. None of us are perfect and we all have moments (I know I do) where we think "Wow! I have not been seeing things too clearly. I wish I'd noticed that sooner." Thank goodness we can move forward and try to do better. And I believe that as we do, a lot of our past mistakes are made up for somehow, through the atonement, as we try to change. I am constantly grateful for how well my kids are turning out in spite of the many huge mistakes that Frank and I have made as parents. Mostly that is because they were such good kids to start out with, and the rest of it is just a whole lot of mercy! Sorry this is a book, but I couldn't let a fantastic, loving mom like you think that you'd done it all wrong! Love you!

Lillybet said...

I am so glad to see you post something again. I like the way you put it about how each child understands love differently. I so agree with that. As I watch you not only with your children but in your life in general I have already seeing you love individuals in the way they need to be cared for. No, you are not perfect as none of us are but each day is a new day and I am confident you will be successful.

RAQ said...

Thanks for the encouragement! I love you both!